The Daily Grill

Metamorphosith

The Hardest Workin' Man In Show Business

We Don't Mess Around

A powerful earthquake struck southeast Iran Tuesday, killing 400 people, injuring hundreds and turning remote mountain villages into rubble, officials said. Maybe next time they'll think twice about listening when WE tell them to stop messing around with nuclear weapons -- not that there IS any such thing as an "earthquake machine" of course...

The Countdown Begins

The New Ice Follies

History: Lather, Rinse, Repeat...

Some analysts are saying that the results of the recent Iraq elections mean a less than pro-U.S. ally than was hoped for by the Bush Administration. Imagine that! That hasn't happened since we helped put Saddam Hussein in place.

The Boy Who Cried "Michael!"

Michael Jackson's defense team intends to call a variety of celebrity witnesses to help bolster his case. Names on the list include Quincy Jones, Stevie Wonder, Nick Carter of the Backstreet Boys, and Bee Gee Barry Gibb. Even if Jackson doesn't get off, the group intends to release a really crappy single.

Always Tip The Sushi Chef

In a Japan a 17-year-old boy stabbed a former elementary school teacher to death with a sashimi knife, then left the body rolled in rice with a side of ginger and a blob of wasabi.

Taking A Chunk Out Of Crime

In Richmond, CA, a would-be robber hotwired a backhoe from a construction site and then tried to use the big metal scoop to rip an ATM out of the wall of a nearby bank. Police are still looking for the perpetrator, who simply may have forgotten where he'd written his PIN number down.