The Daily Grill

Caca For Cookoo Poofs

Ten years after a Pentagon document came out (so to speak) placing homosexuality on a list of "certain mental disorders", the military said it was a mistake. The "typo" was only discovered this month, though the document was printed in 1996. The decision to "clarify the matter" won't change current policy prohibiting openly gay people from serving in the military. Seems like a matter set to rights except when you consider that a decision to commit the country to a ceaseless war against a tiny country that poses no immediate threat to the US is not regarded as nuts, either.

Too Hot To Handle

In addition to the phodoodling I do here on The Daily Grill, I also create the editorial phodoodle each week for the Half Moon Bay Review. Sometimes the stuff I come up with is a little too much for the sleepy little (read "provincial") community (and I really don't want to bring undue heat on my fantastic editor, Clay Lambert...) So occasionally I am asked to come up with something a bit less volatile. Case in point is this week's toonage. The toon to the upper right is what is running, and has to do with mismanagement of funds. But the hot button topic is the goofy situation going on with the two fire departments in the area -- a problem that's been going on for years. The phodoodle appearing below is what I first submitted, but was deemed to be too provocative, in that it was feared it was making fun of the firemen instead of the lame operations they work for -- enjoy!

Karaoke TV Kontinues

Yikes. Totally ripping off American Idol was last night's America's Got Talent, complete with amateur performers and three judges. And judging by the talent on tap, Idol has scooped up what there was in America's talent bin, because it wasn't on the screen on Wednesday night. Somethin tells me this trend is going to continue, too. Why? NOT because America loves it, but because it's cheap to produce. Just like karaoke bars: why pay a band when people will put up with enetertaining each other? Wise up, America. Watch TV that matters and tune out the dreck…if you can even tell the difference any more.

President Poopy Pants

White House Resident Bush is all upset that The New York Times and other news sources reported on the super-secret program to investigate and track terrorist finances by looking into your bank account without due process. Says it was "disgraceful" and, besides, "Congress was briefed," Mr. Bush said. "And what we did was fully authorized under the law." Uh, what law? Aren't those our laws? Shouldn't we be apprised of them? Oh, that's right -- under the War & Emergency Powers Act Bush means his law. Oops. My bad. Shame on you, New York Times!

A Drop In The Bucket

Will the $31 BILLION that megillionaire Warren Buffett gave to the Bill & Melinda Gates Foundation be much help in helping to stamp out fatal diseases? It sounds like a lot, until you consider that we, as the American people, have already tossed $317 BILLION at the war in Iraq and we haven't managed to…well, we didn't…that is, we haven't quite…wait a minute…why are we over there again? And I, for one, would like a receipt.

Stick Up for Rush

The blogosphere is burning up with news that Rush Limbaugh was detained at the Palm Beach Inernational Airport for more that 3 hours on Monday. Airport authorities allegedly found a bottle of Viagra in his possession without a prescription. According to Rush's mouthpiece the Viagra was "labeled as being issued to the physician rather than Mr. Limbaugh for privacy purposes." Apparently Rush's right wing works okay, it's his landing gear he's having trouble with.

Second Verse, Same As The First

Now it's revealed that, in addition to rampant, unheralded and unlawful wiretaps, there's been a secret Bush administration program by which counterterrorism officials have gained access to financial records from a vast international database and examined banking transactions involving thousands of Americans and others in the United States. Which means your bank account has probably been glanced at. According to Stuart Levey, an undersecretary at the Treasury Department, the program "has provided us with a unique and powerful window into the operations of terrorist networks." Interesting coincidence that John Snow resigned as Secretary of the Treasury just 3 weeks ago, before all of this came to light. For those of you who still don't think there's something wrong with the system, you might want to have your bullshit detectors fixed.

We Can Do It

Wasn't it just a couple of weeks ago that some Conservicans were tearing their hair out about the war in Iraq and its effect on their chances to get re-elected? You wouldn't have known it yesterday in the Senate when one GOP pawn after another basically embraced White House Resident Bush's lustily renewed drum beating over that same war. They also teamed up to clout the Demerals for what they saw as a push for an overly hasty withdrawal from the conflict. Anyone have a guess as to what the "magic number" of American soldier deaths will be that signals GOP victories all around come November?

What It Was Really Used For

Summer soltice. For thousands of dancing and drumming revelers, that meant cheering in the day at Stonehenge as the sun rose this morning. About 19 thousand people with nothing in particularly important to do gathered around the ancient standing stones, bobbing and swaying to beating drums, arms outstretched and shouting, "Feel the solstice!" "This is the nearest thing I've got to religion," said Ray Meadows, "Especially now that American Idol is over."

The Bard In Iraq

Another one of Saddam Hussein's lawyers, the third so far during his trial, has opted for a dirt nap after being taken from his home by men in police uniform and shot. The killing of lawyer Khamis al-Obaidi was a new setback for the U.S.-backed court (not to mention causing a bit of panic in the Public Defender's office!) Obviously, someone's paid heed to Dick the Butcher in Shakespeare's King Henry VI -- he's the guy who utters the phrase, "The first thing we do, let's kill all the lawyers."