The Daily Grill

People Are Weird #273

I was pouring $50 of liquid gold into my car yesterday and a dude over at the next island was using the windshield-wiping squeegee to wash his entire car while a buddy waited patiently in the passenger seat. I caught one of the gas station attendants watching and he said, shaking his head, "I didn't know we had a free car wash."

Hive N' Seek

There's been a lot of concern over massive honey bee colony disappearances over the last half year or so, with commercial hives going empty in both the US and Europe. Scientists are baffled, with causes ranging from global warming to pesticides being cited. The mystery may be solved, however -- those busy bees may simply be on vacation. Proof? A passenger plane flying from Britain to Spain was forced to return when they flew through a massive swarm of bees over Bournemouth, England, sucking a bunch of the suckers into their jet intakes causing the engines to surge. Turns out there have been clouds of bees reported over the region for days now, apparently waiting for their luggage to arrive.

Hypocritical Mass

I'm no fan of Fox News, but I'm an even smaller fan of the Democrapic Presidential hopeless who are refusing to participate in a debate slated for September hosted on the unfair and unbalanced news channel. Co-sponsored by the Congressional Black Caucus, the debate will likely be a mostly unfriendly place to turn up if you're in the enemy camp. On the other hand, with so many unenchanting Republicant candidates, it could also be a chance to draw some voters across party lines. But the likes of Clinton, Edwards and Obama will never know -- which shows off an aspect of their true colors: if they can't spend an evening discussing the issues in the face of the enemy, what kind of chance would they have in matters of foreign policy? Bill Richardson's even worse -- he can't make up his mind whether to participate or not...classic fence-sitting that no one wants to see in a president. I'm not sure who's going to be left to participate come September (so far Joseph Biden is the only one to confirm), but they'll be worth watching for their guts alone if nothing else.

You Can Get More Moscas With Miel...

So let me see: Congress just passed bill raising the minimum wage for the first time in a decade. At the same time, a bill is making its way through that will allow amnesty and a guest worker program for illegal immigrants. Not to mention that housing prices are plummeting, making it easier and easier to get into a home now. Some people might see this scenario as a way to entice a flood of immigrants to get into the country, pay them a decent wage then sell them houses. The only wrinkle in the plan is the record-high gasoline prices, but maybe that's designed to make it too expensive to have the INS drive the illegals back over the border.

Is There Concrete-Colored Spray Paint?

Gotta love James Lawhorn, a guy arrested in Wisconsin for "tagging" a Milwaukee bridge. Caught red (or green, or blue...)-handed on the scene, complete with spray paint can and fresh paint on his hands, Lawhorn has said in court that he assumed that the city was giving tacit approval for graffiti artists to do their thing because the bridge had so much paint on it already. He tried the argument in his first court case and then even trotted it out in Appeals court, but it didn't wash either time. The judge sentenced him to 6 months' probation and 80 hours of community service. The article I read didn't specify what the service would consist of but one has to think that much time should be just about right for repainting the entire bridge in concrete gray.

Weak-Willed Wussies

Gotta love the "Democrap-controlled" Congress who have, once again, rolled over as they put the finishing touches on a $100 BILLION war funding bill that White House Resident Bush will sign...because any and all provisions for establishing a timetable for troop withdrawal have been yanked out of it. It's simply amazing, with Bush's approval rating  lower than ever, the majority of Americans saying enough is enough with the War In Iraq® that should never have happened in the first place, and the Congress -- our chosen representatives -- don't have the crotch rocks enough to override Dubya. (Who, needless to say, is also our chosen representative but is clearly determined to follow a special interests "Agenda By The Few".) If anyone happened to have made a sound loop of Nancy Pelosi from last November, when she was crowing over what a difference there's going to be now that the Democrankies are in control, please call her voicemail and play that over and over and over for her...

Martyr Man

I love the fact that James Dobson, described as a "religious conservative leader" says that if Rudy Guiliani is the Republican nominee for President in '08 then he's going to "sit out" the election. No great loss, of course, but his reasoning is because of his displeasure over Guiliani's support of abortion rights, civil unions for gays and his two divorces. Hey, hey, Dobby! What about that ol' Christian forgiveness thing? When does that kick in?

Spin Cycle

I think the world would be a better place if politicians and/or arrogant corporate dipwads would simply admit their culpability. Witnesss Paul Wolfowitz who finally realized he'd better resign before the World Bank tossed his ass out. The way he worded his resignation statement made it sound like they were sorry to see him go: ""Change should not be feared, it is something to welcome. It is the key to keeping this important institution relevant and effective in the future and meeting the needs of the world's poor, and of humanity as a whole." I won't worry about Paul, though. This guy's so wormy that you just know he's going to be instantly hired as CEO of some big corporation, proud of the values and double standards the man embodies.

Extreme Carpooling

Some moms are a little TOO into carpooling their kids. In Germany, the mother of a 17-year-old found out that he and two friends were planning to rob a jewelry store. Worried her darling might be hurt, mom drove the trio to their target and waited while they grabbed some loot and stabbed an employee. Still not sure how they got caught since they could have used the carpool lane in their getaway.

Big Oil Blows

Gasoline prices continues to hit record highs at the pumps, as you must know. Congress had some oil honchos in to slap 'em on the wrist while letting them tuck more money into their ever-deepening pockets with their free hand. The oil magnates have every excuse but their own greed on parade to account for their runaway profits. People are busily organizing 1-day boycotts, which doesn't really make a dent -- they just don't go anywhere then fill up the next day. I have an idea: a lot of people say we went into Iraq primarily for the oil. Why not go after the oil companies the same way (except without the massive lack of effective leadership...)? There are doubtless some petrozecutives that could benefit from a little Abu Ghraibery...